Anniversary Week 2012; The Proposal

At 6am on my birthday {November 15} 2007, my now husband woke me up for a morning drive.

Now, it was my birthday; So, a surprise was expected and with the recent talk of marriage and commitment, my heart was hoping.  But I didn't know, for sure, what he had planned.

First of all, I am not a morning person.  So, I took some convincing to wake up.  Once he promised it would be worth it, I rolled out of bed and walked out the door.  No breakfast, no hair did, no clean clothes on.  NO CAMERA :(  

He took me for a short drive to a trail head near Ina and Oracle and parked the car.  He proceeded to tell me how much he loved me and some advice he got from his father.  I was hardly listening because I was in so much anticipation for him to just ask already, but the one thing I do remember is what he said about his dad.

His dad told him something to the effect of, "If you want to get married, that's great.  But before you do, make sure you accept each other.  As Is.  Lots of people are in relationships and they think, if we get married he'll do what I ask more, or she'll change how she acts.  But the truth is, people don't really change, not at the core.  So, make sure you accept each other, and that all those flaws will still be there in 30 years.  If you can do that, then you're ready to get married."  

He followed that up with, "I accept you, do you accept me?" 

and of course I was so excited I said "Yes!" without really thinking.  

But, thankfully, I did and do accept him.  We've grown closer over the past nine years and all of his flaws still frustrate me and I still frustrate him, but in a healthy normal way.  I still love him, I still complain, but we work together to keep each other happy.  And while I could easily say I wish he'd stop doing __________, I'd lose part of who he is, and I would NEVER, EVER, want to do that.  

So, if you're reading this and thinking about getting married, take my father in law's advice and ask yourself, "Do I accept EVERYTHING about this person?" If not, address it.  If you both accept each other, you're in a very healthy relationship, weather or not marriage is part of the plan.

Proposal/Birthday Dinner at Oregano's 

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