This is what I've learned so far, at 34 weeks. I was reading a similar post at Sometime Sweet and she suggested making a list of 10 things you learned during your 20s, 30s, or 40s. Her list was about 10 thing she learned in her 20s. However, I'm not done with my 20s and my teens weren't super exciting (The only thing I learned in my teens was; Everyone and everything you know and love will change). So I thought about what else has forced me to learn a lot, all at once, and the answer? Pregnancy.
So, here goes;
1. You will get attention from strangers, they will ask you personal information, they will probably touch you, and they will expect honest answers and a smile.
In the past 8 months I've had strangers ask me more personal questions than a job interview, and about half of them touched my tummy in the process. Here is the usual
Q & A:
Question: When are you due?
Answer: March
I like to keep it vague, my due date is in the middle of the month but I could go early or late, so how about instead of due date {which very few women actually birth on} maybe we should start giving expectant mamas due months!
(this is where the fun starts)
Question: Do you know what you're having?!
Thought: A BABY!
Answer: Nope, we want to be surprised.
Response: Oh, I just couldn't wait to find out, you guys are crazy!
From my last pregnancy...
Q: Is this your first?
Thought: yes, but why is that ALWAYS assumed?
A: Yep! :)
{now, I say no, but since I have Sonja with me, it's assumed less frequently}
Usually followed by:
Q: Are you Married?
T: That's absolutely none of your business, would it matter if I wasn't? and, also can't you see the bright pink stone on my wedding finger?!
A: Yep, for over 4 whole years now...
Q: So have you decided on a Hospital?
T: ugh, here we go again...
A: Nope, we're doing a home birth.
usually followed by
Q: Is that Safe?!
or my favorite so far; Q: They do those?!
A: Yes, they STILL do those, and it's safe for me :)
These questions aren't too bad, but in the moment I feel like I'm being interviewed, which I guess I am, for the most important job in the world; motherhood. But, seriously strangers, could you have a little class and keep your opinions and hands to yourself?
2. You will (might) feel nauseous All Day Every Day for the first few months, but never actually get sick.
This was the case for me. For an entire 3 months all day, every day, I felt like I needed to puke. But, nothing happened. I was miserable the entire time. I lived off pellegrino and saltine crackers for the first trimester.
3. Your body will do what it wants, when it wants.
You will gain more weight than you want or than what is "normal." Almost everyone I know gained more than the 30 recommended pounds for an average woman, most gained about 40 while others gain 50 and more. As long as you're eating healthy, do not freak out about your weight. My sister is in better shape now after her 2 sons than before. Your body will go back to "normal" it will just take a little effort at first {or little effort thanks to breastfeeding, my calories just slid right off}
Also, you will want to get sick, at the worst times, and you might. I remember suddenly neeeeding to throw up while driving and searching frantically for a bag in my car, not finding one and holding my purse open over my lap just in case. Thankfully, I only ever threw up 2 times with Sonja. Both times were random, though. I went to go to the restroom and found myself vomiting, unexpectedly, instead.
4. You will not like some of your favorite foods.
Mine were:
Coffee -luckily after the 3rd month I was able to enjoy it again.
Eggs -one of my few sources of protein as a vegetarian, and I love them, except every time I ate one I almost ran to the bathroom to empty my stomach, super frustrating, this faded about 5 months into the pregnancy. This time I don't mind them unless I THINK about the fact that they are eggs, the reproductive fluids of chickens and what not, but I just choose not to think about it.
Salad (leafy greens) -I usually eat salad with every meal, but in the first few months, they made me queasy, now I'm able to eat spinach and such with meals but arugula still bothers me..
This time, I wanted salad everyday for weeks before I knew I was pregnant, so your favorite foods might change from one pregnancy to the next.
5. You will like some of your least favorite foods (see: foods you gag thinking about).
I never eat fast food, ever. With Sonja, I was about 2 and 1/2 months pregnant and running an errand. And, I drove past a McDonald's and thought I really really want a hash brown with ketchup right NOW. I had enough self control to not stop, then, however, I pasted a second one, and couldn't resist (now I know why they're on every corner). I ate it, and it was delicious. And, now, if I think about it, I want to gag. It was so greasy, my pores and arteries hurt just thinking about it. With this baby my cravings and aversions are practically non-existent which is nice since I like to be in control of what I eat.
6. Your husband will be more supportive than you thought (or maybe I'm just lucky).
In the first trimester, I slept. A lot. Everyday when I'd get home I'd crash. I was always the one to cook dinner, but I just didn't have the energy. My husband's family is Italian and they're all great cooks, he just never had the need to cook. Over the past few months he's cooked some amazing meals and done almost all the house work. I knew I married someone great, I just didn't realize how great until I got knocked up and he started bringing me breakfast (cereal and milk are all I wanted) in bed. He is financially, physically and emotionally responsible for me when I'm pregnant I'm just so tired all the time. He does EVERYTHING. I would have never expected this much before I was pregnant but now that I've been spoiled it's hard to imagine it any other way.
7. You will have to force yourself to have vigorous sex.
Okay, so this isn't totally true. But, you will have to get creative. In the beginning of my first pregnancy I was scared to do anything because I was afraid it would hurt the baby. This pregnancy I am more comfortable with my body and generally comfortable. But now, I have a bowling ball attached to me, making it rather challenging to get comfortable. Either way, our midwife vows the 3 things you can do to make labor easier are: Walking, Squatting and having lots of "Vigorous" sex. We've been attempting to take her advice.
8. You will cry for stupid reasons, and people will understand {or they won't}
I found myself crying in the grocery store because I was shopping alone in my first pregnancy. During this pregnancy, I forgot to get my coffee card stamped and found myself with tears in my eyes because I was just having a "bad" day.
9. You will pee your pants.
I did this with Sonja's pregnancy at least 2-3 times, from laughing but was able to stop it before I had a full on accident. This time, I got a cold and EVERYTIME I coughed I leaked a little, unless I was able to fully brace myself in a seated position. I know other people who started laughing and just started going and couldn't stop. BE PREPARED! or at least have a change of pants with you.
10. You will feel like you can't get any bigger, and then... you will.
I just looked at all my pregnancy posts from my first pregnancy and thought I was going to find images of me bigger than I am now, and I am feeling smaller than I thought I was with Sonja at this time, but when I looked at the photos I realized I might actually be slightly bigger at 30 weeks this time around than at 30 with her, and then I saw what I looked like at 35 weeks and realized I am still going to get bigger. and then bigger. I've got about 10 weeks left and while I feel big I thought I was going to have just a little gain left, but now I'm realizing how much bigger I'm going to be over the next 8-10 weeks {or 12!} and I'm a little concerned.
I've learned lots more as a mom, which I probably should write down for myself so I can remember all the little things, but for now I'm going to lay down and rest because I've got some Sonja free time, and it's hard work growing a baby.
My next pregnancy update should be done this month and you all can see how big I really am. Keep an eye out.
-Jenn
So, here goes;
1. You will get attention from strangers, they will ask you personal information, they will probably touch you, and they will expect honest answers and a smile.
In the past 8 months I've had strangers ask me more personal questions than a job interview, and about half of them touched my tummy in the process. Here is the usual
Q & A:
Question: When are you due?
Answer: March
I like to keep it vague, my due date is in the middle of the month but I could go early or late, so how about instead of due date {which very few women actually birth on} maybe we should start giving expectant mamas due months!
(this is where the fun starts)
Question: Do you know what you're having?!
Thought: A BABY!
Answer: Nope, we want to be surprised.
Response: Oh, I just couldn't wait to find out, you guys are crazy!
From my last pregnancy...
Q: Is this your first?
Thought: yes, but why is that ALWAYS assumed?
A: Yep! :)
{now, I say no, but since I have Sonja with me, it's assumed less frequently}
Usually followed by:
Q: Are you Married?
T: That's absolutely none of your business, would it matter if I wasn't? and, also can't you see the bright pink stone on my wedding finger?!
A: Yep, for over 4 whole years now...
Q: So have you decided on a Hospital?
T: ugh, here we go again...
A: Nope, we're doing a home birth.
usually followed by
Q: Is that Safe?!
or my favorite so far; Q: They do those?!
A: Yes, they STILL do those, and it's safe for me :)
These questions aren't too bad, but in the moment I feel like I'm being interviewed, which I guess I am, for the most important job in the world; motherhood. But, seriously strangers, could you have a little class and keep your opinions and hands to yourself?
2. You will (might) feel nauseous All Day Every Day for the first few months, but never actually get sick.
This was the case for me. For an entire 3 months all day, every day, I felt like I needed to puke. But, nothing happened. I was miserable the entire time. I lived off pellegrino and saltine crackers for the first trimester.
3. Your body will do what it wants, when it wants.
You will gain more weight than you want or than what is "normal." Almost everyone I know gained more than the 30 recommended pounds for an average woman, most gained about 40 while others gain 50 and more. As long as you're eating healthy, do not freak out about your weight. My sister is in better shape now after her 2 sons than before. Your body will go back to "normal" it will just take a little effort at first {or little effort thanks to breastfeeding, my calories just slid right off}
Also, you will want to get sick, at the worst times, and you might. I remember suddenly neeeeding to throw up while driving and searching frantically for a bag in my car, not finding one and holding my purse open over my lap just in case. Thankfully, I only ever threw up 2 times with Sonja. Both times were random, though. I went to go to the restroom and found myself vomiting, unexpectedly, instead.
4. You will not like some of your favorite foods.
Mine were:
Coffee -luckily after the 3rd month I was able to enjoy it again.
Eggs -one of my few sources of protein as a vegetarian, and I love them, except every time I ate one I almost ran to the bathroom to empty my stomach, super frustrating, this faded about 5 months into the pregnancy. This time I don't mind them unless I THINK about the fact that they are eggs, the reproductive fluids of chickens and what not, but I just choose not to think about it.
Salad (leafy greens) -I usually eat salad with every meal, but in the first few months, they made me queasy, now I'm able to eat spinach and such with meals but arugula still bothers me..
This time, I wanted salad everyday for weeks before I knew I was pregnant, so your favorite foods might change from one pregnancy to the next.
5. You will like some of your least favorite foods (see: foods you gag thinking about).
I never eat fast food, ever. With Sonja, I was about 2 and 1/2 months pregnant and running an errand. And, I drove past a McDonald's and thought I really really want a hash brown with ketchup right NOW. I had enough self control to not stop, then, however, I pasted a second one, and couldn't resist (now I know why they're on every corner). I ate it, and it was delicious. And, now, if I think about it, I want to gag. It was so greasy, my pores and arteries hurt just thinking about it. With this baby my cravings and aversions are practically non-existent which is nice since I like to be in control of what I eat.
6. Your husband will be more supportive than you thought (or maybe I'm just lucky).
In the first trimester, I slept. A lot. Everyday when I'd get home I'd crash. I was always the one to cook dinner, but I just didn't have the energy. My husband's family is Italian and they're all great cooks, he just never had the need to cook. Over the past few months he's cooked some amazing meals and done almost all the house work. I knew I married someone great, I just didn't realize how great until I got knocked up and he started bringing me breakfast (cereal and milk are all I wanted) in bed. He is financially, physically and emotionally responsible for me when I'm pregnant I'm just so tired all the time. He does EVERYTHING. I would have never expected this much before I was pregnant but now that I've been spoiled it's hard to imagine it any other way.
7. You will have to force yourself to have vigorous sex.
Okay, so this isn't totally true. But, you will have to get creative. In the beginning of my first pregnancy I was scared to do anything because I was afraid it would hurt the baby. This pregnancy I am more comfortable with my body and generally comfortable. But now, I have a bowling ball attached to me, making it rather challenging to get comfortable. Either way, our midwife vows the 3 things you can do to make labor easier are: Walking, Squatting and having lots of "Vigorous" sex. We've been attempting to take her advice.
8. You will cry for stupid reasons, and people will understand {or they won't}
I found myself crying in the grocery store because I was shopping alone in my first pregnancy. During this pregnancy, I forgot to get my coffee card stamped and found myself with tears in my eyes because I was just having a "bad" day.
9. You will pee your pants.
I did this with Sonja's pregnancy at least 2-3 times, from laughing but was able to stop it before I had a full on accident. This time, I got a cold and EVERYTIME I coughed I leaked a little, unless I was able to fully brace myself in a seated position. I know other people who started laughing and just started going and couldn't stop. BE PREPARED! or at least have a change of pants with you.
10. You will feel like you can't get any bigger, and then... you will.
I just looked at all my pregnancy posts from my first pregnancy and thought I was going to find images of me bigger than I am now, and I am feeling smaller than I thought I was with Sonja at this time, but when I looked at the photos I realized I might actually be slightly bigger at 30 weeks this time around than at 30 with her, and then I saw what I looked like at 35 weeks and realized I am still going to get bigger. and then bigger. I've got about 10 weeks left and while I feel big I thought I was going to have just a little gain left, but now I'm realizing how much bigger I'm going to be over the next 8-10 weeks {or 12!} and I'm a little concerned.
I've learned lots more as a mom, which I probably should write down for myself so I can remember all the little things, but for now I'm going to lay down and rest because I've got some Sonja free time, and it's hard work growing a baby.
My next pregnancy update should be done this month and you all can see how big I really am. Keep an eye out.
-Jenn
Great list. I'm 39 weeks and I've done all but pee my pants. I'm not bragging because I know there's still time!
ReplyDeleteOh I hope you can make it all the way! It definitely is something to brag about if you can avoid it!! Seriously, every time I sneeze I have to brace myself for the worst.
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